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Go there, click on dancing fudge 'ems and then click on techno. Not sure why this makes me laugh so hard, but it does. Only one thing could've made it better...


Sep. 21st, 2006

Okay so I'm back.
We moved into a new apartment and when they went to turn the internet/cable on the guy forgot a tool to get into the box he needed and had to reschedule. So I've been without tv and internet for nearly two weeks now. But I"m back.

Just thought I'd let you know I'm not dead or in labor :)
I feel like I have so much more packing to do. Actually, I *do* have a bunch more. We're moving all this tomorrow and I don't even have close to all of it packed up. I'm having to do it all by myself since Alex is working...so it's taking me forever. I never realized how much freakin' stuff we have!
God I am so freakin' excited! He's getting another call on Thursday where the guy will offer him a certein base pay, and then it's final. Yesss we needed this so much!

Sep. 10th, 2006

I'm sorry that I want to save us money. It doesn't matter if it's "YOUR" money, it is the money that now supports our family and I refuse to let you waste it.
Today was my last day. Very bittersweet. On one hand I'm so glad to not have to work anymore, especially at wal-mart. On the other hand I hated leaving my friends. But hell, it's wal-mart I'm sure I'll be in and out of there a lot.

Soon I'll be jobless...awesome!!! :)

Well, Sunday is my last day at work. I can't wait. Alex was trying to get me to stop working even earlier, but I wanted to wait until then. I don't really do anything at work anyway. My back is all messed up so most of the time I sit down and stuff photo envelopes. I never really do anything else, they would probably be better off without me even being there. I would much rather just sit at my house and clean.
Then 3 days after my last day (on the 13th) we're moving into a new apartment. Mom is coming soon after that to buy the crib for Jacob and I can start getting his room ready. Time has just flown by so quickly, I can't believe he's almost here!

Okay so I overreacted...

I got back from the family reunion last night. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. It was actually a really good time, and when we left Alex's grandmother gave me a hug and said, "Welcome to the family hun." It was really sweet, I am really starting to feel like part of the family.

Anyhow, more details later and definately some pictures. But for right now it's about time for my dinner and then to bed with me...maybe clean a little first. Talk to you all later.

Good lord.

Of course when I'm already feeling horrible today Alex has to make me feel worse. That's just the way that things go in this house. We are going to a family reunion for today and tomorrow, and I'm already really upset because I just have this feeling that everyone in his family hates me. His mom tried so hard to talk us into adoption, and I think that she thinks that I used this pregnancy to "trap" Alex into a relationship. The truth is that I gave him every opportunity to leave. I even told him that I would sign papers saying that he didn't have to pay child support, and that if he wanted nothing to do with me and his kid then so be it and I didn't need him anyways in that case. But he wanted to stay, that was his decision. I just feel like she thinks I used this to get him to stay with me, and in turn I feel like she told his whole family that I did. I'm not sure that she said that, I'm just saying that it's how I feel. So now I get to meet his whole family (lots of them I have never met before) and all I can think in the back of my head is that all of them think I'm some two-faced slut and they don't want me to be part of the family. It's probably just an irrational thought, but it still hurts. And to make matters worse Alex wakes up late, and then gets angry because I haven't cleaned. I plan on cleaning the kitchen up before we leave (which takes seriously all of 6 minutes), and that is all that truely needs to be done. But of course he has to bitch about it first thing. Later on he'll apologize and say, "You know I'm in a bad mood when I wake up." I don't care if you're in a bad mood, there is no reason to take it out on me just because you like to be an asshole in the mornings. I did nothing wrong so kiss my pregnant ass.

Anyhow, time to go clean and pack I guess. Alex should've been up a freakin' hour ago so we're running late as hell.

Roxy pic.

I love my Roxy girl. She likes to lay on my belly :)